


Forgotten truths

by ShadowSelene (Shadowdianne)



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Anti-Hook, F/F, TW:Abuse mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-13
Updated: 2017-08-13
Packaged: 2018-12-14 16:20:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11786877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowdianne/pseuds/ShadowSelene
Summary: “H-How long have you been standing there?" Asked by dragondeathcab via tumblr--------“I can help.”The whisper was too soft on the now orange-tinted room. They were late, Emma thought, very late and Hook had probably already seen that Regina wasn’t at Granny’s.“I don’t need…”





	Forgotten truths

The feeling of the dress beneath her fingers was cold and impersonal, the shiny finish of the fabric turning the paleness of her skin into an almost yellowish tone. Emma swallowed as she eyed her face into the mirror in front of her; the sharpness of her cheeks almost cutting her flesh as she did so, her eyes red-rimmed and devoid of any kind of light.

Where had that happened? At first, she had blame it on the little to no sleep she usually had in a normal basis whenever a new baddie was in town. As weeks, however, began to pile up she had found herself trying to find even more inconsistent lies to hold the little feeling of normalcy she had within herself. However, her fingers hurt, her chest screamed at her whenever she tried to take a bigger breath than the swallow-ones she had started to take and everything, from her skin to her muscles, ached.

When had she started to lie to herself? That question made her smile lopsidedly at her reflection. One in where blonde locks fell around her face, framing the lines that had started to get embedded there, wrinkles that a year before hadn’t been there. A year… a full year.

Glancing at her wedding ring she suppressed a shudder, one that she had found trying to not pay any attention to more and more as the first week of her marriage had passed. The screams and recriminations had arrived slowly at first but the very first night she had gone to bed while asking to herself what had she done wrong had been the very first time the shudder had made its appearance.

And now, as she kept looking at the ring, she suppressed yet another tremble.

She was late though, she knew that. She was supposed to meet everyone at Granny’s, start the celebration party for a year without enemies. She, however, couldn’t make herself leave the small room Snow and David always had for her on the house they had bought half a year ago. It was just as light-filled as the room Emma had had back in the days when she had lived with Snow and sometimes, if she closed her eyes, she could even picture herself back at those months in where Snow was just Mary Margaret and Henry a ten-year-old. The picture was, all in all, just that and as soon as she let her eyes open again the pressure of reality make its appearance in the twisting knot at the back of her throat at the thought of having to smile for yet another reunion, next to Ho… Killian while trying to pretend that she wasn’t being given jabbed comments about when they were planning on having a kid of their own while the man drank his weight on rum. Or wine. Or beer. These days he wasn’t overly picky.

She would also end up being asked by him why she had gone to her parents to change, smirking as she tried to placate him, knowing that that night they would end up discussing yet again. No matter if she told him the truth or a well-practiced lie.

Dragging a sharp breath, she extended her right hand in front of her, eyeing the wedding ring with glazed eyes and a sour taste on her mouth; the weight of the small band burning on her skin. It was perhaps because of this, because of the dress, the lines of worry and the greys and whites that seemed to be the only thing filling her vision, that she muffled a scream and tore the ring from her finger, her nails scrapping its sides, leaving behind red marks that burnt but not as much as the ring that she now hold on her other hand, the band glimmering on the evening sun that spilled from the half-closed windows of the room.

She could throw it, she thought darkly, throw it, say that she had lost it. It would be a futile lie, he would probably see right through it, but the momentary thought of getting rid of it was enough for her to turn towards the window, considering how far she would be able to throw it to the garden outside.

“I can always make it disappear if you prefer.” A voice echoed at her back, making her jump just in time to catch the shadow of a purple mist disappearing around the silhouette of Regina who eyed her from the doorjamb, dressed in blacks and reds and with one brow arched in her signature look. “Although I guess it would spoil all the fun.”

Emma swallowed as she put her hand behind her back, like a child being caught in the proverbial cookie jar. She felt a mix of ire and fear beginning to settle on her chest and she swallowed, not really knowing what else to do.

“H-How long have you been standing there?”

Her lips were chapped and she licked them, the sound of the wind outside the only thing that filled the room for a second before Regina closed her eyes for a moment and sighed, opening them again almost instantly.

“Enough.”

The revelation made Emma blush, realizing that her weakness -because, at the end, wasn’t the scene she had just starred in, just that? The proof that she was everything but the savior? - had been witnessed by Regina no less.

“Regina…” She begun, not really knowing what to say. Ever since the marriage her relationship with the former queen had changed, turning strained and difficult for many different reasons Emma refused to think about. Not even when Snow sometimes asked her if she had called or seen Regina more than the few times Henry insisted on having dinner all three together. The friendship they had once had-as strange as it had been- felt as if it had cooled down and now that Emma eyed her, she realized that the woman had cut her hair again, never reaching the short length of the very first time they had seen each other but definetely shorter than the last time they had been together.

Strangers, the word cut deep and yet that was what they seemed to have turned into. Defeated, the blonde closed her mouth, hand still tightly closed around the ring.

“Snow asked me to come here, see if you needed any help, check that you… hadn’t fallen asleep. Apparently, it had happened before.”

The careful observation was filled with the hidden question of that being true clear enough to make Emma wince; it had happened before after all;  Sometimes the discussions between her and Hook were far too heated and she needed the break that bed brought to her. Snow didn’t ask her about it, not after they had ended up screaming at each other the first time she had tried to talk to her about why she had appeared in the middle of the night tired-looking and seeming about to cry. David had tried to talk to her as well but she refused to explain herself. And now… she found herself not knowing what to do except humming at Regina, the former queen nodding quietly before taking a step towards her, one hand reached out towards her.

Emma could remember a time in where a similar situation had happened, in where Regina had come to her and she had taken a step backwards. Today, however, she didn’t move, far too frozen to really think of moving.

Regina’s fingers were warm against her wrist and she shuddered because of the touch. This time, though, for entirely different reasons than minutes before. They closed around her arm, leaving behind warm imprints Emma could almost imagine as painted lines on her flesh.

“I can help.”

The whisper was too soft on the now orange-tinted room. They were late, Emma thought, very late and Hook had probably already seen that Regina wasn’t at Granny’s.

“I don’t need…”

Regina cocked her head to one side and kept on gazing at her, bright brown eyes that made her fall silent before the former queen sighed.

“Emma… I can help.”

And Emma knew that she shouldn’t be doing this, any of this, like the time she had knocked on Regina’s door, less than a month after the wedding muttering about how wrong she had been only to end up kissing Regina and running back to Hook while feeling Regina’s presence on her for weeks to end. They had never talked about that night and yet she was able to see it on those brown eyes that kept on gazing at her, that kept asking her to open up.

She shouldn’t be doing anything of this, she should be at Granny’s, with Hook…

The ring fell to the floor and her voice broke in a bubbling mess as she nodded once, then twice.

“Please….”


End file.
